Acts of courage: Constance McMillen

I’ve been gobsmacked lately by the poise and courage of a teen in Fulton, Mississippi, named Constance McMillen. Maybe you’ve heard of her. She wanted to wear a tuxedo to her high school prom and bring her girlfriend as her date. The school district refused. She sued for discrimination and she won. But rather than allow a (gasp) lesbian couple to sully the (swoon) innocence of its prom, the school district cancelled the event altogether. Except it turns out they didn’t.

Parents organized their own private prom, and students and parents alike concealed from McMillen the information about when and where that dance would be. That’s a shameful throwback to the days of desegregation when white parents would host private proms so their children wouldn’t have to be subjected to the sight of black classmates dancing. Nonetheless, private parties are not subject to  laws against discrimination, so it’s legal. Sad, but legal.

But here’s the kicker: apparently, the parents and students weren’t the only ones keeping the secret. The Itawamba County School District cooperated by telling McMillen and half a dozen other students, among them two kids with learning disabilities, that the dance was on after all — and set up a Potemkin prom, chaperoned by the high school principal and several teachers at a local country club, announcing it at school as the “official” prom.

Let me repeat that for you. The school district didn’t just look the other way as parents — setting a glorious example for their children — deliberately excluded a student who had done nothing wrong other than plan to go to a school dance with the date of her choice. The school district didn’t simply passively condone this appalling show of closed-mindedness. The school district actively encouraged and participated in the deception.

One expects casual cruelty from teenagers, but one expects more from adults, especially adults who make much of their “biblically based values.” One pauses here to say to the grown-ups of Itawamba County: Shame on you. Shame, shame, shame.

Setting aside (because I am not a lawyer) the dubious legality of the school district’s actions, put yourself in Constance McMillen’s shoes. Her school district has basically made her the one whose fault it is that prom is “cancelled,” thus making sure her classmates consider her the scapegoat. Then her classmates and their parents, who are apparently carrying on a multigenerational tradition of bullying, have plotted to hold an event designed specifically to exclude her. And finally, she shows up at the “official” event to discover that it’s simply window-dressing intended to let everyone involved wash their hands of any legal liability.

And what does Constance McMillen do? Why, she tells reporters that at least the learning disabled kids got to enjoy dancing at the fake prom without anyone making fun of them.

People are offering her advice and scholarships to help her get out of Mississippi, but would you believe she’s said she wants to stay? This girl has more grace, more empathy, and more cojones than all her classmates and the so-called adults around them combined.

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Hanging

I spent a lot of quality time over the weekend mounting a dozen photos on black foamcore. The prints ranged in size from 8×10 all the way up to 20×30; when I was done and stood them up around the room to look them over en masse, they seemed very large and impressive indeed.

Then I took them to Olive and hung them, with a lot of help from Jerry, one of the owners (and a little “assistance” from his hyperactive puppy). They looked pretty darn small on a very wide wall two stories high. Nonetheless, once they were all hanging and the lights adjusted accordingly, I stepped behind the bar to get the full effect, and all of a sudden it hit me: people are going to see these photos. Lots of people — it’s a busy bar. And some of them might even buy one.

I finished hanging everything at around 3pm. A few hours later, just after the bar opened, a friend who’d stopped in for a cocktail texted me to let me know that someone there was vocally admiring my photos and checking out the price list.

If I can sell just one of the larger prints, it’ll cover what I’ve spent on supplies for this show. Cautiously optimistic!

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